Hold on, I'm google imaging "vagina close ups" to see if mine match up
around noonish you got carried out for spitting water and throwing cups at old people...
Just got walked in on during safety inspections
Think you passed?
so im gonna ask for shark week off tomorrow at work and i advise you do the same
Using what I learned in my global terrorism class last semester to sneak booze onto my cruise. thanks college.
i drank out of my shoe...were you seriously expecting me to be the voice of reason?
I woke up next to her will a oven mit taped to my cock. Dear god, I might have tried to use it as a condom.
My vagina would be awesome. I would be the most popular girl in the village.
The bruises are from paintball. The money is from me being awesome
To be so small, the mini-horses are exceptionally aggressive. And fast. Very, very fast.
Abort! Abort! He almost bit off a finger!
We play this game where we catch up on what we missed over five years of not talking to eachother, then we have sex like nothing ever happened.
I also have to vacuum the broken noodles out of my suitcase...
Don't tell me you're on acid again
how soon in a friendship can you start calling them a motherfucker
You know my vagina and my heart have a mind of their own even when it’s pouring snow.
Randomize
