Oh. They ARE dating. Kinda sad. Have such an urge to be a huge bitch and steal him but my morality is in the way. FUCK YOU MORALITY.
She was the most uninteresting drunk I've met
he said he wants to do me james and the giant peach style. im afraid of what that means. but moderately excited. wish me luck.
I just undressed him with my eyes. And gave him a 10 inch penis. I hope its true.
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theres still like 7 beers in the gutter from the roof party we had last night. i dont know how we got up there. but we need to get those beers down.
my tonsil wound opened up during the kegstand but i stopped it with a popsicle
I just had a great idea for an etsy shop. Sell all the shit bitches leave from one nighters
Hopefully this dress says "let me rent your house" and not "let me suck your dick for money"
He came on my pillow pet. That's unacceptable. I hate boys.
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I'm going to write a new song and call it "Did I wax my vagina for this?" remind me to never go across the country for a penis ever again.
Started crying to "that's the way it is" by celine. What the fuck uterus?!
The guy I hooked up with last night left me alone with his dog AND IT JUST SHIT ON THE FLOOR. WHAT DO I DO
I'm starting to think my emotional health is declining because I was watching transformers today and legit almost started crying
i pushed adam in a shopping cart for 15 blocks, then we realized we left tyler downtown
did you go back and get him?
nah we went to a karaoke bar instead, so worth it
Theres a free llama on craigslist. Are you in or are you in?
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