honey bunches of taint.
What can i say im a girl who smells like weiners.
I think I'd do Clint Eastwood.
...kinda gettin a major gay vibe from you right now.
That was a text you sent me last night.
just took my birth control pill with a shamrock shake. happy st. patrick's day
This lady in my dui class just asked what patron was. I feel like she doesn't belong here
It's going to be great. We're a perfect team to break up marriages and happiness.
Ps. The strap-on in the pic i sent you last night was not mine. Just wanted to clear that up.
I have just figured that it takes exactly 2 and a half rums to clean the bathroom..
That's the international "my vagina is unoccupied, come talk to us" chant. You have your mission. Go.
I didn't get a chance to take any pics but the mental snapshot of her boyfriend calling her directly after we finished was a really special moment I wish I could properly share with you.
She tried to subtly measure me, but I noticed. She told me I barely made the cut otherwise there would have been just a handshake as a parting gift.
I'm all dressed in my outfit from last night, and I'm not even the sluttiest person in Walmart right now. God bless Miami.
He tried to buy me a drink at dollar beer night. All 3 of his credit cards were declined, so he asked me if I could cover it. Needless to say, I'm not calling him back.
I promised her before I left that I'd make good choices and then got drunk and fucked my best friend and her boyfriend.
Will exercising make me less horny?
Randomize
