So im pretty sure the object of my emotional onterest is tired of playing with me....
Best moment of my life. I just got a text from some random number that said i can't wait to touch you. Her name is kiara and she had the wrong number.
I knew my chances of getting laid had increased after she walked into my room and yelled "DICK TIME"
He shit in the bushes next to the pool at the Venetian, after throwing up in the hallway. You really can do anything in Vegas.
Her bed looked like it had just hosted a water balloon fight. It was that good.
There was booze on his face and I wanted it. I'm not sorry.
There should be a rule. If your dick is under 6 inches, you are not allowed to dress as Thor.
I SMOKED SO MUCH I SKIPPED A DAY.
We ended up at an Asian frat. I made out with two Mexicans at the same time and I pulled a muscle in my leg from twerking too low. Diversity.
My vagina feels like it's been kissed by angels.
Life is my bitch right now. The bouncers tried to carry me out of the club, but everyone thought I was crowd surfing so everyone carried me BACK IN. Winning as fuck.
pray to the hookup gods
You're wasting your dick. It needs to be bestowed upon the masses.
My New Year's resolution is to chill out on the group sex. At least with my friends anyway.
It was like Strip poker and blow, but with Yu-Gi-Oh cards
Randomize
