Is this a definitive no? All is forlorn? Such is fine, but i'm drunk and a sucker for concrete answers
you know you're not getting laid when you start breaking awkward silences with quotes from Robot Chicken
I just love slightly exposed cleavage. Not too much to be whory but just enough to say "your kids will never go hungry"
i guess i called my mom last night. she wasnt nearly as impressed with what we did in the bathroom as i was
i was trying to wake him up so i just kept touching his dick
I'm doing laundry in pjs and heels, home alone with my margarita bucket.
It's not even like I care. He was cute 30lbs ago and before he fucked that Michael Jackson look alike.
Is that a tongue signal to get over there? That's how my two heads are taking it.
So I'm sitting at my desk and Thunderstruck came on my iPod. I then proceeded to drink coffee every time I heard thunderstruck. Who says you don't remember anything from college?
Also I fell in love w a girl dressed as a pirate that was great at doing the limbo
Just leave a note saying "riding dick see you in the mornig"
She was just trying to do dick voodoo. Pretty standard stuff.
Dude, A DAMN CHEESEBURGER HIT ME IN THE FACE!!! WTF was i suppoused to do!?.
You don't make any sense
TEQUILA
If it's any consolation she turned out to be has a collection of clown dolls she talks to crazy. And the cops knew why I was calling when she key locked the door from inside.
Randomize
