dude you have to find out what a girl's name is before you sleep with her. if her name is debbie she's boring, if her name is lauren she's an overrated hoebag, if her name is meagan she gived bad head.
I've been meaning to ask you. The first night in the city did we do key bumps with a suicidal homeless man? My memory is fuzzy
what is it with giant penises always finding me
Walt said he was feeding me so I wouldn't die. that's why there was pasta in my room
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
PLEASE. I won't throw up on the floor this time. Or fuck in the bathroom. Or dance on the pool table. So PLEASE.
So I wore a corset to school. Fuck laundry.
Shouting "one vagina to rule them all" was probably not the best way to meet our best mates fiance
Then that means he's outwardly conservative. Inwardly he's a total gay horndog. He's like a spy that can ruin conservative plans.
I want to change all my life goals to that.
He showed up riding a bike blasting the ghostbusters theme song. His name was Lasercat. Im in love.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You have no idea the kind of bodily contortions I had to do to access your neighbor's WIFI
Is this what it's like to be an adult? You plan out play dates for your vagina?
The only thing he told me before he passed out was that he is from Buffalo and I'm a bitch.
I just described cereal to my mother as "acoustic breakfast soup".
who is this
I definitely almost just pulled a condom out of my purse instead of money for my dad.
Looking back at our past texts, the minute it turned 2020 you were cleaning your house and I was dying of the cold. We were prophesying the Rona.
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