You're mentally unstable and I would hate to be you
I think the recipie for awesome sauce is butter and semen
i woke facing the corner with my computer and i had googled "how to put out a fire" i am so scared to turn around
Worst hangover of my career vs the return of the blue balls. Will keep updated
he was drinking cheap vodka with warm tap water and a packet of crystal light. if that's not an alcoholic then idk what is
Bring it all. We will have a potluck of drugs. It will be magical.
i had a threesome. one of the guys used to bully me in high school too for being gay.
My middle name is suave and my vagina shoots rainbows, what else would you expect?
I fell on my face, puked, and had to be rocked to sleep in a hammock. I'd say Europe is a success
Let's just say we ended up at Denny's with a strippers shoe that we had to discreetly leave at the door to the strip club this morning
My head feels like Jesus is projectile vomiting hammers on it
the conference was great. we had to hide the acid in a planter in front of the department of agriculture though
Thanks for duct tapping my dick to my leg while I was passed out. I could only aim straight down. I stood on your bed. Have a nice day at work!
I woke up with a shot glass nestled between my boobs like a baby bird.
only i would get cock blocked by a cop
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