Lost. The hour! Funtime!!!!
you kept talking about how hot andy milinakis is and the things you would do with him. no more tequila from him.
dont you remember the bouncer yelling at you while you were trying to piss?
no. why was the bouncer in the bathroom?
he wasn't. neither were you.
you almost dropped the shot glass then you thought you were such a hard ass for catching it that you slammed it on the table and broke it
I don't even know. I woke up in the bathtub with no shirt, covered in towels holding what appeared to be vanillia pudding mixed with captain morgan.
Tried to ride the mechanical bull pants less, got punched for making out with some lesbians wife, and you tipped the bartender with a can of skoal.
I regret nothing
Finally buying a camera. Missed out on recording a 3way last night. Hindsight. Ugh.
Your roommate from freshman year just had a baby. I think you're winning. Hooray for fifth year seniors!
his butt looks cute in my panties so i decided he has to wear panties all the time from now on.
how do you always get into these "we banged the same dude now lets be friends" situations???
I've officially dedicated my newly single life to making myself squirt.
You said "I'm not gonna waste my last condom on you" last night.
I just spent 100$ at a sex shop to make myself feel better. And I signed you up to win 200$ so if you win, it's mine. And yes I'm serious.
Well guess who isn't a virgin anymore
guess who isnt wearing pants has a shaving cream beard and is afraid theres no cream cheese in the fridge
the answer to that last one was me. the answer to the first one is you, you sly dog
I'll be an awkward "I've had the grooms penis in my mouth" presence and we can party our nipples off.
Randomize
