Yes, I fucked her, no she wasn't that loose, yes she caused more drama than a 14 year old girl
you don't remember? you called me at 330 crying because you were in the middle of having sex with corey and forgot his name. all you kept saying was i'm a drunk bitch.
I would give away a ton of these clothes but I doubt there are any homeless people who dress as slutty as me
That drug basically just makes anything that's in your mouth awesome
he broke into my appartment and left me a waffle maker...
Like. There is beer on the other side of that door and 6 yards in. If he's not back in 20 minutes to let me in, I am using this tree as a battering ram.
Uh oh. Middle aged belly dancers. And they just got out swords. Shit is about to get real.
I just got a msg from someone saved in my phone as "gouiys stAndingg nezxt me not oz". Omh my life.
Just took 4 secret shots in his bathroom to not remember him naked.
I brought some guy back to have cheese whiz with me. Then sent him home
Was he satisfied?
No, and very vocal about it.
I'm glad they extended train service last night. People crying, screaming, throwing up, fighting and peeing themselves on a train made me feel like I've got my shit together.
One does not fall in love, one falls flat on the their face after leaving a bar
You yelled This cop is arresting me for possession! Possession of MARIJUANA!!", everyone cheered, and you let him handcuff you and take you away.
You were laying in a hotel bed drinking beer from a straw while you demanded everyone to kiss your foot tattoo.
Like I could never be a lawyer because I would just look like a porn star impersonation of a lawyer.
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