before i could say "i'm not that kind of girl", i was.
Birthday Coupon: This text is good for alteast 3 hours of Birthday Sex. Redeamable any time, anywhere, and any style.
Judging by his buldge, this guy is huge. just paid steve to follow him into the bathroom and find out. They had a convo about it.
i pretended i was deaf and got a girl to come home with me
Confirmed. Vegetarians give terrible head.
you had me at cake vodka
Also, even though this really sucks now, we will look back on this one day and laugh at the time we all got arrested on Thanksgiving
I started crying then my dog licked his dick so yeah.. Kind of ruined the moment.
I just stole some rubbers from the girl I stayed with last night so I can use them on a different girl today..
nobody was home so I boiled the dildo
I think he should just go away to a small penis island and never come back
I still have a little drunk in my system
sam was dropping a deuce next to me. wrote me a note that said "glad we shared this experience." passed it under the wrong stall. the other guy picked it up. that's all I know so far.
I feel like you should store your weed in something that suits your personality. For example mines in a hollowed out disney princess book.
You know that we wouldn’t even be talking about all this if you would have kept your candy consumption judgement comments to yourself.
Randomize
