my mario cart skills improve with alchohol. and i think my real car skills do to but the cop didnt see my logic
he wants to bone in the snuggie
my passenger side seat is covered in alcoholic jello with a nude mannequin in it
Haha so I huess that means he's a little over 7. I can use my throat as a ruler!!
One less school supply you need to buy!!
and now there are teeth marks on my dick.
did you know the cops in wilco have clean up kits in their cars for when people puke in them? i found this out this morning. i'm finishing paperwork now. come get me plz?
You made me drive your car so you could give the dude from the parking lot a BJ in the back seat. Classy.
He used a trumpet as a funnel, said something about valve oil, and puked all over the garage.
I think I'd rather see her get hit by a car in one of those Russian dash cam videos on YouTube.
But like it was sooo bad! At one point he tried to flip me over and he fell off the bed
So I heard her yell at him and I went downstairs to find he had lit up each one of my smokes and taken just one drag off each and had em lined up on the table. She says he "experiments" when on Ambien.
Almost ran out to the street bowl in hand when I hear the ice cream truck pull up outside.
Everything about that text makes me proud to be your sister.
momentary stint on a second floor library computer...guy next to me snorted blue adderall off his notebook through a cut straw, i cant tell if this guy is my hero or just plain crazy...
Is it still sex if there's no nudity, no orgasms, but the neighbors bang on the wall and ask you to stop? I've honestly forgotten.
I just remembered something from last night. check your closet.
Randomize
