lol you are funny thanks bro I'll take you to a strip club
I don't wanna go to a strip club I'd rather get my boobs free or earn them from a series of good deeds
Ha! What's wrong with that? Hard work deserves compensation. I accept cash, checks, and boobies!
I think scott just propositioned me for sex
Great. My funeral dress now smells of smoke and disappointing sex.
Whales. Broccoli little trees giant. Magic in cat form. I want my loco and juice. Black in shower. Brb remember life.
after i talked him through a bulleted list of why we couldn't have sex he just said "but it would be fun...."
You climbed into the Suite next to us at the game so you could steal the half eaten hot dog someone had left on the table. That high.
You asked me if you had to go downstairs to get upstairs. And then you forgot where you were.
Well I have rug burns in both armpits, somehow. So yes you should have been here
I bet, I woke up to you like naked at 4 in the morning shoving a sandwich in your face
A prostitute stole us beer at 3 am
Honestly, I want an afternoon of mild abuse, mixed with face fucking and general molestation that turns in love making, laughter and cinnamon toast crunch naked in bed.
Better not shit yourself at the gym.
I have got to stop telling people I was almost a prositute every time I drink
so hungover. idk whos house or comp im on
I'm going to tell you something and I want no judgement because it's america day and I'm wearing an American flag bathing suit but...I woke up in a yard.
Randomize
