you wouldnt answer to anything but devil's advocate all night.
Got 6 blowjobs in one weekend... new personal best.
Someone carved 'Hank' in all caps in the snow outside my apartment building so naturally I turned the capital H into a K and added an S to the front.
I think college has really matured you.
I've decided that my new worst fear is that I'll end up on "I Didn't Know I was Pregnant"
i just shit on the floor of my room. my roommate was in the bathroom, my choices were limited.
She gave 2 thumbs up when Nirvana came on the radio while blowing me in the bathroom
Well, I'm at the grocery store wondering whether I exist or not.
The same guy who pierced my nipples just told me he can help tutor me in precalc.
i just want to be sober by dinner like is that too much to ask
Look. I've got things to do today.. Will you hurry up and come over so I can give you some head and get my day started already
Outside
I should come with a disclaimer that reads "bad at relationships and defensive when confronted about it"
or maybe "WARNING: picks fights when bored"
He started tongueing his parfait and told "thats what I'd to your ass" in the middle of Starbucks. Of course i brought him home
So drunk I thought the door was feeling me up for a seconds
I think the fact that I stole someone's mail and broke my big toe means that I should consider taking some time away from vodka
Help. I am eating nachos. But I'm with some guy. I need help. I don't know where I am. The nachos were so good. I'll bring them but help me.
Randomize
