i found her turbo button.....if you know what i mean.
they said they heard you say put it in my butt
Professor took us out for drinks. She said if I ordered the 64oz "Call a Cab," she'd give me an A. I drank it in 5 minutes. A+?
The bar I'm at just passed out smores to everyone. I don't know what it has to do with cinco de mayo but I'm down.
I swear if it wasn't for meeting for drug dealers @ gas stations, i would never remember to get gas.
The last thing I remember is stabbing him with his diabetes medicine
Last thing I remember is beer bonging sangria. Dear God.
Guy, there will be accountabilities this weekend that you will need to respond to, or else.
Didn't know hookah bars could end badly. I feel for her hair
im In safeway buying a bottle of Ciroc in short shorts at 3:00 pm on a Monday, yeah I don't know either.
I'm starting to question if I'm gonna need to bring a raincoat just to drink around u
U act like I can cum on command
It was only funny because some guy across the street was getting his mail and he just stopped and watched me throw up everywhere
That's Danny the boy who threw up in the Doritos bag
whoevers yellow car is in your driveway right now... i plan to steal. just an FYI
condom fairy costume came in handy...we were making out in my living room and he wanted it so i took a condom off the costume and we did it right there...with my tutu still on....
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