their songs make me feel all the things I wanna feel. Ya dig?
and what kinds of feelings would these be?
Happy, horny, occasionally hungry
I dont ever wanna see you tell my little brother to "spread the seed" ever again
she was so hammered she started drinking dishwasher detergent
I dont know whats funnier - that, or that we learned that poison control is closed at 2 AM
He kept singing "who's that peekin in my window" we thought he was high til we realized someone was lookin in the windows.
I'm handcuffed to the toilet. Don't ask
Yes, I did know where her mouth had been, but frankly I think it was a lesson you needed to learn.
He left me a five minute voicemail apologizing for chasing me with a meat beater. I'm actually not sure what that means.
But on the up side she uprooted a whole peony plant from the hotel downtown and said, "I brought you flowers"
they lined up to high five me when i got taken out by the stretcher. The paramedic high fived them too
before the moonshine you were already braiding the bouncers beard -_-
I remember having the weirdest thoughts and thinking our room was a compass and we were in the compass or something.
I walked in her room to find her rubbing lotion on her face high as fuck.
What do you want to swallow. Press 1 whiskey press 2 rum
He just pulled out my weave during sex....needless to say I'm embarrassed and in need of another shot pronto
We couldn't find her anywhere. Finally, I saw her sitting in my bathroom floor spraying hair mouse into her mouth and whispering "I fucking love whipped cream." WHAT DID YOU GIVE HER AND CAN I HAVE SOME?
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