Was just hit on by a guy with 2 kids and one was named Rocky. I need to get out of Buena Park.
Alex, there's no such thing as a fancy sex store.
doctor said mango vodka does not count as my daily servings of fruit. damn.
Some girl next to me in class is making a list of whta to pack for spring break & it was a normal list until she put birth control in all caps w/ stars around it
its not college until your roomate walks in on you having sex in his bed. twice
nothing like walking down the street with a garbage bag of puke trying to find a dumpster
She thinks she's a fairy, dude. A real fucking fairy with wings and shit.
July 5th AKA Day of regret AKA picnicing in a laundromat. Someone puked allover the comforter. Liffe of champions.
It just goes to show you, your dreams can come true. You can hook up with your dads hot married friend.
Happy heartbreak day....you got chocolates, I'm eating them/ throwing them out the window at passing couples
I totally just stopped for a booty call on the way to my parents for easter....good friday is an understatement
Ran into my neighbor that's always crying. I wonder if she's like; "I ran into my neighbor who's always playing with her vibrator?"
Oddly enough I feel totally fine now. Clonazapam and red bull the breakfast of champions.
Can we climb Your roof?
No bitch its 2am go home.
It's nice doing the walk of shame at 530 am, the birds are chirping, campus is empty, and it's dark so noone can see who the Fuck you are
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