are we going to glenview for practice??
(3 hrs later) aids
where r u? what is story? im way too high right now
Freshman orientation day on campus. Dear diary, JACKPOT.
is there a reason why there is cup of piss in the fridge?
no
The only comparison I have for the iPhone is that it's like youre constantly getting a blow job
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So where are we on this whole, you write my paper...i do sexual favors situation?
STOP CALLING ME LADY CHLAMYDIA
I would ask why there is a chair tied to the door of the fridge.. but I am not sure anyone knows the answer.
Was just told that I was slipped 2 hits of acid in my in flight drink before takeoff. 8 hours to Germany wish me luck
What an age we live in that I can try to pick up a guy by using my phone while I'm taking a shit at work.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My fridge broke, and apparently the back is missing. The repair guy just fixed it with a pizza box. I didn't ask where the box came from, but it wasn't mine. Reason #20 why rent is cheap.
On another note; I'm three days away from being 1/12th of my way from not having sex for a year. I need to get laid.
Nobody's dick fell into my mouth tonight
How is someone going to pee on the floor two days in a row? Fuck this place.
Jesus fuck. I just hit on him in front of the whole fire department. They hit the sirens and told us to get a room. FML. I can never go back to that fire station again...
Would you still love me if I got a Whatever Forever tattoo? It's like the Emo kids' Live Laugh Love
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