ugh.. my birth control just came out of my nose. wtf?
We've started doing pot butter shots. WHY AREN'T U HERE
You can't buy drugs with a ziplock bag full of quarters, chuck-e-cheese coins, and a starbucks giftcard.
I pretended I didn't remember seeing him hookup with that freshman, and he pretended he didn't remember seeing me hookup with that old guy. We have a beautiful and unawkward friendship.
Guy Shares All The ‘New Discoveries’ He’s Made Since Moving In With His Girlfriend And It’s Hilariously Relatable
Yes and yes. Got taken to a Florida strip club. I desperately want to flood my eyes and ears with hand sanitizer right now.
I asked him how his night was and he sent me a picture of a bottle of Ciroc with a bendy straw...
I was scared that I should know him but I was too busy blacking out to remember
Her instagram is literally selfies, cats, and guys she's fucked.
You were a hurricane of blowjobs and glitter makeup. You came out of the closet and took the house down with it
Guy Accidentally Starts A Group Chat With All The Girls He’s Talking To And Gets Absolutely Roasted
I don't want anything calamari shaped after last night. But I appreciate the Cheerios offer.
Hey. Im sorry to bother you but I just watched the seinfield episode about faking an orgasm and it caused me to second guess myself. Were you satisfied?
I just wanna get drunk and watch Tarzan with you is that to much to ask?!?
Soooo I think my neighbor just saw me masturbating on my porch
Just found out that the guy I lost my virginity to voted for Gary Johnson. It's almost more upsetting then him ending up being a massive asshole.
Why is no one on Snapchat tonight? I want to see other people having fun so I know it still exists.