I'm too hungover for some lady to talk to me about potatoes
Over it. He probably jacked off to bible verses last night. I don't want that
you are the best fuck buddy i could have, all the others get feelings and morals involved
Is it illegal to masterbate in an airport?
It's spring break, I'm sure it's ok.
he handed me my panties in front of my date. turns out he wasn't that mad.
I demanded respect from my fuck buddy. Drunk me is not fun.
I think i morst likely have 95 %patulas for hands and probably i also went to eGypt with so manyfriends. We laids in the sarcaphoguses.
You sound pretty unsure about all of this.
Just had a 40 min argument about how many celebrity guest appearances on Sesame Street were court ordered for DUIs.
Dude that's beautiful. I've never heard of someone smoking with their bunny.
I feel like I have a connection with him. A marijuana-induced-spiritual connection.
I've got the dick your vagina needs, but not the one it deserves right now.
I actually had to tell him that sex doesn't replace my Tupperware. Our relationship has reached a weird level.
As soon as I got there, you appeared out of no where, yelled "they're giving away free cigarettes!" in my face and then disappeared and I didn't see you the rest of the night.
Spending Thanksgiving making a swinging profile brings the day to a whole new level...
I tried to put my heels in the coat check
If its not for food we ain't going out.
Randomize
