She's dressed as Musafa. How could this not be a good idea?
there is a large number of people floating in the fountains the morning in inter-tubes...its only 930. did i miss something?
I woke up while squatting on top of my bed peeing on my comforter and my laptop
We took up a collection and paid her $50 to eat a piece of meat. Vegetarian morals trumped once again by cash.
I really couldn't tell if she was disgusted with the fact that I yacked on her shoes, or if she was about to do the same to me.
I just bought 1/2 a fifth of vodka out of an old school baby carriage from a homeless man. Gotta love this city.
I smell like I just crawled out of a bottle of champagne and landed on the floor of taco bueno.
There's a guy in here whose face looks like it would be perfect between my legs.
i sent you a picture of beads you send me a picture of boobs how hard is this to understand
There's no winning that game with me. It's either "Can I walk home at the end of the night," or "am I throwing up trying to sleep in the front yard." Rules are irrelevant.
I just spent 5 minutes saying how beautiful you are and you come back with dont get fat cause you have weird nipples.
He's a doctor now.. hope he can cure his small dick
Why did I wake up in bed with the ironing board and a Mariah Carey mask? Vodka hates me
He has fairy lights round his bed.. And played Jamie cullum when we had sex... Hes batting for the other team right?
they told me that it was glow in the dark and would make me magical. I was too drunk to say no. I woke up to a purple vagina.
its like a neon Im stupid as fuck sign
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