I thought he was gonna sex me but then he ran to my bathroom and jerked off
i bet if teenage jesus was here he would do a shot with me
I only have two playlists on my iPod. One for when im getting drunk, one for when I'm getting high. Is this something to be worried about?
It's my 3rd annual 21st birthday party. Disney themed. There will be blood.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I would lick a homeless mans crack teeth for a cup of coffee right now.
Lets play hurricane shelter. And the shelter is my bed, and we forgot our clothes.
I got blood in my smoothie but it still tastes ok. Fuck glenfiddich.
WHAT THE FUCK KIND OF NINTENDO FILLED GLORIOUS ENCHANTING FANTASY LAND ARE YOU IN?! DUDE DID YOU MOVE TO THE 90S?!?!?!
Officially conquered sex on my couch with my dad asleep in the next room
I like how you say "conquered" as if that was your sole mission in life
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I swear to God if you fuck my cousin I will fuck your dad.
I’m ready to be reckless and make stupid decisions, and I need you to support me in that.
idk how many shots you took between 2:39 and 3:05, but your message went from "Please text me tomorrow." to "Why you sto textom?"
I had to break up with her. She was sending me study schedules and recipes for vegan lasagna. I’m just trying to survive man
It was platonic naked porno viewing, I swear.
The gift for sixth anniversary is steel. He bought me handcuffs. Inee I married the right man!
Randomize