What did I say to him last night?
Something along the lines of "your not here, I'm going to fuck sam. call me later babe, this won't take long, love you"
all in all not a bad night
this party is like a fast-foward into the future when im 40 and married with children
im a genious. moved my bed and mirror so i can watch the game while Fucking
A friday without alcohol is hardly a friday at all
I'm babysitting and we're watching Barney and I don't understand why Barney can magically make band hats appear but he makes them make shitty ass instruments.
Barney's a jerk
if u cant get laid at this wedding we need to have a looooooong talk about the possibility of u becoming a lesbian
You are very nonchalant about the high probability of us having an orgy.
Eh, I'm ok with this, this can work. We're the best kind of the worst people.
he told me he was a Boston Bruins fan so I took his hat into the bathroom and peed in it...I've never been a prouder Ranger fan
and that my friend is why you dont go in for an eye exam and drop 250 dollars on a pair of glasses after smoking a blunt
Throwing up out both ends. This is not how I pictured adulthood.
I'm scared to touch anything in this apartment. Even the ceiling.
There's a guy in a life size dick costume, and two guys with white shirts that are each half if a pair of breasts in a red bra lol. They came separate but when they saw each other there was some titty fucking in the street, it's only 11
well it was great until i saw his anime body pillow
I'm just going to take a nap and hope I wake up more attractive.
I'd like to thank Vicodin for getting me through family thanksgiving once again.
Randomize
