what ever happened to devon sawa?
fuck...who knows?
i'm really worried about him.
i wish i could shrink down to the size of his dick so i could just thank it in person.
His bookmark is a piece of toilet paper. No shame there.
Is there a reason why the cops knew her name as they were chasing her?
I still don't know why you took that job... it sounds miserable
not having any beer money sounds even more miserable
My period started right as he was entering, which really helped me sell the "I've never done this before" bit.
I dont think ive ever had a drunk day betray me so hard before
Beer acquired. Food is cooking
Wow, you are almost sliding into home plate for some stellar fellatio
It's like your tits told gravity 'fuck you, I'm fine right here!'
Felt so good this afternoon, figured I wouldn't have a comedown. Wrong. Just realized I've been staring at a wall for 40 minutes contemplating the color yellow.
I want you to get off the plane and get directly into my pants
Hey, I left a taco in your dishwasher.
I'm disproportionately drunk. But I also spelled disproportionately right twice so maybe I'm not that drunk
Also, two points for knowing me well enough to know I definitely would put the moves on his brother.
You know the rule about how you feel bad for getting food and not offering other people you're around, does that apply when you eat burger king at a strip club?
Randomize
