Alls I know is that his gf looked like Beyonce and he looked like Babar
Surefire way to sober up: discover that your car is being towed at 2 am.
How does me getting a new dildo make you crave olive garden
No. I do not want to discuss your lesbian tendencies with my sister.
She still started it.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
This is great- I found hangover detoxifying bath salt online. It flushes out the alcohol. We need this.
I believe I won the Golden Vodka Bottle of sadness last night for crying while being party boyed.
This is my first time seeing you since your lesbian experience. SO EXCITED!
Did u smell a guys dreadlocks in the McDonald's drive thru line last night or did I dream that?
You lit a fire in my vagina no man can extinguish.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
A milkman. But instead of milk I'm delivering marijuana. And instead of a milk truck it's an armored car.
You're a weed delivery man, in an armored car?
Is it inappropriate to be Drs. Willy Fister and Jess Hewill as a couples costume for Halloween?
Oh we're gynecologists
I would pay to watch a Bravo special of you getting Botox.
he said "be careful" then handed me a cheezit...
Dude. I need you to practice dancing around in your banana hamock. Party boy style. I'll call later with details.
I'm so high I have morphed into the monopoly man. Or maybe the Pringles guy. I don't know but I have a mustach now
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