you won't ask to borrow his earbuds because you think it's gross, but you'll have sex with him?
Man now I have poo on my blackberry!!!
brownberry?
birthday sex, birthday sex, birthday sex
I'm on my period, period, period
All he was doing was sitting in the car, staring. We asked him what was wrong and he just turned, smiled, and said "everything has its own pair of boots"
i dont care if it was her birthday. if she leaves me with a half rack of budweiser and her boyfriend obviously shits gonna go down.
well.. I tried flushing my sandals down the toilet
Yeah I fingered her in the crowd and the dj saw it and gave me props over the speakers. I got so many high fives.
Post a pic on facebook and see if those same 46 girls find shitting in the bed handsome and adorable
I'm wearing a suit and have no chance of getting laid or robing a casino. I consider this opportunity a failure
If I can ever get control of my legs I will be home. Thanks... and again sorry about your bed.
I just got winded making my bed. How do you think the workout plan is going?
he asked me where I was going to school, and then we started having sex, and I answered his question forty five minutes later after we were done. It was the chilliest thing ever.
I just realized my hands still smell like your cock. Which is awesome, but I wonder if the clerk at the store appreciated it.
I feel bad. I'm the reason hand sanitizer exists.
So, my eyeglasses somehow ended up in my nightstand drawer and they're covered in lube.
We'll just play naked Twister, the rest will take care of itself
Randomize
