Of course im so fucked up sarah. I fight away tornadoes.
I don't think he's ever woke up with a paraplegic stripper sitting on his face before.
I wrote a list of all my homework due in the next few weeks. I feel I've done enough for tonight.
Superbowl + Mdma, hope we're on the same page.
I don't care if you go out, because at the end of the night I know i'll be the one fucking you.
that was completely unnecessary, true, but unnecessary
she gave up head for lent, but she said sex was still fair game
she said we were using the spray butter as air freshener
This guy just tried to hit on me on facebook. His most recent listed education is middle school. This is my life.
6 beers and it feels like I've been drinking water... Daiquiri time
he told me i could have the honorable privilege of being the second girl to have sex with him in his new apartment, what a gentleman.
Now some guy that's in my phone as " Alex lip ring hot" is texting me and I don't where life is taking me
Just gave my thesis presentation, pretty sure I made out with the admissions woman last night.
Got an egg Mcmuffin combo, and put the hash brown in the sandwich. That level of hungover
Maybe you should slow down tonight...
KINGS DON'T NEED ADVICE FROM LITTLE HORN-BILLS FOR A START
Best part though was when he wanted to cuddle and I was like, I'm going to go.
Randomize
