did you get my message about your dog?
no... is he ok?
no, i didn't see him when i was being chased out of your house. check your drive way :( sry
I was totally willing to let her keep giving me blowjobs as long as she didn't think we were in a relationship.
I asked my mother if she peed on that chair, she said "not bad" There is no good level of pee on a chair.
he stopped mid-fuck to ask me how my day was....
i just lost my virginity for the 9th time. when will guys stop believing that nonsense line
I just feel like a girl who's never eaten a pb&j probably doesn't swallow
I just texted him and asked him to keep some in case I need help sealing the deal.
Girl Scout cookies are like roofies for fat chicks.
Promise me you won't have sex in my room
I can't promise you that, but I promise you that I'll try
Might want to in your tub tho. That thing is fucking huge.
Don't. You get on the 18 year old. I'll get on the 38 year old. Together we will bridge 2 decades of cock.
Don't think anyone else in the building has a lunchbox full of yay
Hey there's a sandwich in there too!
Hey, ok if I kidnap you? I wanna test a theory.
My lease is up and I've been thinking, it's only fair that the guys I've fucked in this apartment in the past year help me move. They enjoyed the bed, now help me move it.
One singular head for man, one giant climax for mankind
I sit across from him at graduation so I get to stare at him and think about how I fucked his step brother and laugh to myself
No I dont want him to bring his twin brother, cause then ill have to entertain him with my vagina
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