you need to leave class get on facebook and start untagging IMMEDIATELY
just a heads up, there may or may not be a mailbox full of the leftover beer on the table in your basement.
Had sex to a Lionel Richie song. I have a feeling I was conceived to it. Finally reached full circle.
she walked in on me snorting my prozac. there was no way to convince her i was doing a good thing.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
They set the pop up pool in the basement-running filter and all. Drunk swimming. Come now.
He ate me out while I was wearing a tiara.... I think I could get used to this
If I was gonna be at your campus for halloween weekend, I'd dress up as the masked horny fairy and give out condoms. I'm so thoughtful.
that's how you measure success
By how bad my vagina hurts on a Tuesday morning while I'm trying to figure out how I got white girl wasted on a Monday?
I believe in weed hangovers. To say the least.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I woke up in his bed wearing nothing but a penn state hat. We are....
I stopped his blowjob to raise 3 fingers & whistle the hunger games tune to the people walking past the window
His girlfriend left him for the pizza guy. I am not fucking kidding.
Bitch are you kidding? 2016 is gonna be the year our pussies run for president
All I remember is pissing by the garage and the next thing I know I'm on fire
There's even glitter on my cock...
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