is hooking up with someone you used to babysit wrong?
Jason Williams (yeah the ex-nets center...) drunkenly told me that, while drinking, I should take an ambien and a cialis before i go home...that will "give me a 25 minute window to have sex and then goto sleep before the bitch starts bothering me"....
he changed my name in his contacts to "rick", so his mom wouldn't know he was texting me
I'm just trying to jam my tits into some coconuts and I'll be on my way
the bartender cut u off when u asked him for his screename so u could IM him later
found my necklace. it was safe with all 6 boxes of peeps that i bought that night.
He ate me out while I was wearing a tiara.... I think I could get used to this
And we won't even have to pay the tab if we die AT the bar. So..win win.
trapped on the roof of the strip club. help
I hope after we constantly bang for 2 days straight we can agree to be friends again
He convinced the breakfast vendor to melt twix bars on bacon for me at 4am. He slurred every word. I think I found my prince charming.
I can't believe i lost my ID... bringing my birth certificate to the club was a weird experience
I gotta give him props though, I've never been propositioned for sex via flash mob.
At least life still wants to fuck me.
sitting in the prison waiting room in my boyfriends clothes. looooong story.
Randomize
