but, i was nude. you really should respect my stupidity and delete them. please.
You know your in college when you decide house chores with games of beer pong...
I just got an email from a bridal website with the subject "Countdown to your Wedding Day"... is 11AM too early to drink the rest of the wine we have?
after I pulled back my foreskin she said, "cool like a transformer". I really like her now.
My last memory involves me naked in a mens's bathroom stall. I really hope my date was with me.
HOW AM I SUPPOSED TO LOOK FUCKABLE IN AN ALL NEON SPANDEX JUMPSUIT?
We did it in the bathroom in Taco Bell. We didn't buy anything before we left, which I thought was rude.
It's official. This guy and I are going gay for each other. We're tasting the fucking rainbow.
Well, most of my extended family doesnt know about my love for the penis, so they dont have a reason to disown me
I fucked in the bathroom while everyone listened and banged my dick against a table shouting "order in the court"
It's like the bat signal. He only texts me when I'm naked.
My fridge door just caught on fire somehow.
You were a for sure 10. You put on a traffic cone to meet someone.
i feel sensations at the ends of my beard. Either I am super high. Or my face has accepted my beard and I completed my transformation to Mecca
On another note I am sitting in my bed naked, buzzed, and working on a notecard for my 8:00am test tomorrow. I think I need to make better choices.
Randomize
