Just saw a man in a wheel chair using his feet to push himself backwards through a crosswalk... good morning Atlanta
it's like your virginity...sometimes you have to pretend like it's still there
no, no, no. omg. i said i wanted a SANDWICH! not a picture of your dick. damn cant you read? SANDWICH! now im blinded. great job.
She said, "I don't really go out much, but my husband recently cheated on me" and I don't remember anything after that.
Also, ran into my neighbor across the street. He told me about scheduling his vasectomy. We are officially way beyond the acceptable point for asking his name again.
In the world of sexual, erotic texting, you rank somewhere between "how much teeth do you want" and "how dry do you want it"
Getting day drunk before work is perfectly acceptable when its 99 cent margaritas.
I don't know. What do people who don't get stoned do?
I think the exact words were 'I'd lett him to the weirdest shit to me'
at crossfit today a guy shit his pants while deadlifting 405 lbs. coach made fun of him then congratulated him on his new personal record.
She looks like a hot George Washington...I'm going for it
Sleeping with him wouldn't be considered hoeing out... It seems more like babysitting.
I need a hoe opinion
go on
I think I broke my toilet with my head. There are ceramic pieces everywhere. and I might still be drunk.
I just smoked part of an Oreo cuz I thought it was some hash you left
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