Would you feel weird if I asked out ___?
You dont call on our son's bday but you want to know if I'll give you permission to date my best friend?
So...no?`
I just needed to know whether or not to wear panties to work tomorrow.
Kinda felt bad though cuz she whimpered and shuttered a lot, i felt like i was kicking a puppy, only the puppy liked it and came a bunch
It's not my theme song, it's my blowjob song. There's a difference.
whatever. as long as im no longer referred to as the girl who fucked the pledge on his big brother's couch.
I apparently spent $173 at the bar last night. The proof is in the vomit on my pillow and the receipt I tried to clean it up with.
At least I cut out the pieces of your hair where I braided gum into it last night. Thank me later.
apparently we spent 30 minutes inside that big Nike store turning all of their Duke gear inside out. for some reason the employees didn't stop us.
The fact that she put a frat guy in check tells me I did some good raising my little sister. Time to see if she does keg stands.
He walked into the bar right as I was licking the shotglass clean. We made eye contact for way too long..
His Instagram is like a gay porn blog all of the sudden got conquered by the Mormon missionary that he is
Truth be told it's significantly easier to get over someone when they file a police report on you
Aww you are cute. With your penis. And failures.
He ate me out in the passenger seat of his Range Rover in a Tim Hortons parking lot. I could hear “oh canada” on the radio from a nearby school as I came. Most patriotic orgasm ever!
Everybody at Lexi's party found out I'm both a screamer and a moaner after he ate me out on the pool table downstairs. Just another sunday night in Alaska
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