I'm playing the sound guy on a porno set
I'm totally gay for Miss Californiaaaaaa
oh sweet, sweet irony
Yeah i mean there's 3 guys fighting over me. It would just be bitchy of me not to get with at least 1.
I had a dream that I had 21 friend requests. it was the best day
i used the phrase horny rhinos in my paper. i hope my teacher appreciates the size of my balls
i was that girl throwing up in the urinal. it was a dark moment in my life.
No, this is non-alcoholic oatmeal.
halloween is the only time that anne boleyn, the joker, a cowgirl, and a mexican man complete with sombrero and poncho can all hit the same blunt
ahhhh just came to creep and you're not there AND your thong you were wearing last night is on the floor..someone has some explaining to do
He was just lying on the living room floor watching Star Wars with six empty pack of cigarettes and two empty cases of beer.
In his defence I guess I did take the bed, couch and dining room set in the breakup.
I like that our conversation ended with "im gonna go get pregnant goodnight"
Lesbians had sex in my bed last night. It's a thing of pride
It's six am and her daughter just walked in on her mom and roomful of naked people playing strip spoons. glad Im apart of that childhood memory....
But I don't wanna live with them bc I need to be able to walk around naked and sex on any surface guilt free.
What's the best way to tell someone that I accidentally wound up in a gay harem?
Randomize
