what if cement was really a rainbow color they just secretly paint it grey so as not to distract drivers
are you high?
you just can't say no to drugs on a mirrored table.
spending the week with her family was quite possibly the longest ive ever gone without having a boner
In a meeting with the accounting department. This shit is even more boring in real life and there isn't a professor to wake me up.
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i woke up to him dangling his cock in front of my face
Just when I thought this night couldn't get any worse, my dad sang and dedicated Sexual Healing to me at kareoke night.
Cumming on a girls face is guy code for you're not wife material.
he went up stairs with nothing on but calvin klein's and an eskimo hat, said hi to her dad, got a doughnut, and left like it was an everyday thing
i got shots of sambuca dumped on my head last night. my bag still smells like licorice. making me nauseous.
it is a nice little reminder of the bruins dominance. if Vancouver had won, it would somehow smell of maple syrup.
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Last thing I remember is Dusty riding the bikes we "borrowed" from the hotel through the CVS while the rest of us picked up the girls who were laughing at him
Ummm didn't i have pubes when i went to bed last night?
Also I told several people at the bar last night that my dad the alligator wrestler died wrestling an alligator. So if anyone asks that's real.
Do you think the police would frown on me opening a psych drug pharmacy on the side? Just to dispose of my drugs without polluting the water supply! It is for the animals!
i now understand why vodka
The vodka gummy bears are so strong. If I die of alcohol poisoning, please tell my dad it was single malt scotch.
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