Do ugly people know they are ugly?
The quiet ones do.
my boobs just fell out on the dance floor. my wedding is totally beating your wedding
No mine's bigger. It just looks smaller because I'm drunk
two gay guys came in and bought just a kite and a box of wine. Why cant I have saturday nights that awesome
this kid woke up on our hotel floor and doesnt know how he got here
on my way back.. me and that kid will be great friends
just spent the last 4 hours covering his room in sticky notes. Viva Drunk Thursdays.
Agreed. And i highly doubt it could be awkward. You do remember our introduction was a direct result of you mentioning your affinity for my genitals, right?
What time did you start drinking?
Maybe.
Maybe isn't a time...
Only I could run tino my father in law while looking at condoms at Rite Aid. At 730 on a Thursday morning. I'm in trouble.
My girlfriend is studying for the MCAT by watching The Magic Schoolbus. There go my dreams of being a househusband.
she pointed to my dick and said you are going to save the world
You kept chewing on the empty milk carton and saying "kitty" over and over again. It was an interesting night.
He told me was "pretty like the wife in some movie where the husband is a cheater." I think I'm gonna fuck him.
Nah leave him alone, he is at the strip club with his mom.
We hotboxed his bathroom. going to be a good night
Hotbox went wrong - smoke sets off fire alarm. Firefighters coming
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