i'm in the guys across the halls apartment. i think 7 MIP guy wants me. he just got a medical marijuana card. might be worth it.
her orgasm sounded like a fucking walrus crying.
just upgraded from jello shots to jello bowls blacking out just got that much more delicious
ok this guy next to me just sat down with a no joke, 10,000 page book, popped an addy, cracked open a red bull and opened the book to page 1.
i have my own cum on my nose right now. don't talk to me about "embarrassed".
She told me that when she orgasms she just lays there like that baby from teenmom. Who the fuck says that
So the drug dealer I'm sleeping with just got drugs from the other drug dealer I'm sleeping with
Isn't life beautiful?
I may have played more drinking games with my family this last week than all of freshman year...
Hahaha I can already see the arrest warrants. It's gonna be beautiful. I'll get them framed.
Let's say hypothetically if you were going to put icing on a penis and then lick it clean...what would you ice it with? Not a knife right?
...and that is the first time I've ever wished fewer naked women on someone I like.
That's how pantless uber rides happen
sex on a trampoline, in the rain, on ecstasy, just thought you should know.
So my best friends wedding ended with everyone seeing me getting eaten out behind the forbes church. Classy!
dont know what thebfuxk is in rhat shit, but dont lemme have antmore
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