i woke up with socks on this morning
so?
i didnt wear socks last night
Watching NYC prep. Doing a shot everytime one of these d-bags flips his hair. I give it 10 minutes before alcohol poisoning set in.
I convinced her san diego was a state. all the proof I needed was saying, why do they call it san diego state university?
we sixty- nined on a tennis court.. not even drunk. you say insane. i say creative genius.
For some reason I just don't think you going to the gay bar alone on thanksgiving is a good idea.
Medically YOU CAN'T BE AN ALCOHOLIC TILL 25!!!!! WE GET 3 BONUS YEARS!!!!
This baby is an asshole
I had a great time except for the part where you called another guy, told him you were in a cab - not on a date - and that you'd meet him at a bar in 15 minutes. but besides that it was awesome. Next time capping you at two glasses of wine
Making drunken Mac n cheese at 3 am I understand why witches constantly stir their cauldrons. Much more homogenized temperature and slim chance of boiling over. Good job witches.
Question. There's no better feeling than clean shaven balls. Do girls get that too?
Shia LaBeouf arrested in austin for public intoxication. JUST DO IT
Rum and your dick are involved. You're relying on the unreliable narrator.
Uhm I have a bottle of tequila, a gallon of orange juice, and leggings. Now ask me again how hard im going? And that doesn't cover tomorrow.
For future reference: When the bouncer is approaching you to remove you from his bar, you don't respond by taking off your pants.
My vagina is the only part of me that is pleased you lived through last night.
Randomize
