It's true. Ladies love me because I'm so strong and they feel safe. Not because of my pseudo charm and their impaired judgement after several drinks...
all we need is a web designer
and a bunch of prostitutes
turns out gay frats are just like normal frats, only with more v-necks
im a genious. moved my bed and mirror so i can watch the game while Fucking
Just got walked in on during safety inspections
Think you passed?
nyquil sex gave me 6 orgasms so I support that
And the cops told us we were all naked.
We have 10 gallons of home brew. And james has an amazonian blow dart weapon that sticks in bags and the wall. Come over
Just watched my roommate stuff a sandwich in his pocket because we're out of paper plates.
Between having seen you naked and interpreting your values based on the occasional political FB post, you're no stranger for sure.
Just bought a dildo. Happy first time single in four years Valentine's Day to me
I walked in on him pumping himself up by headbanging to the drumbeat from Jumanji.
it wasnt that bad
you tried to climb into my fireplace while screaming TO DIAGON ALLEY! we didnt even watch harry potter. it was bad
He's throwing Skittles into my cleavage and some are rebounding into my crouch.
Well he's scoring either way then.
What were you even doing out there at 2 a.m.?
Look, i had a gallon of lemonade, a pack of smokes and a Darth Vader voice changer. What did you EXPECT me to do?
Randomize
