Im eating ham and mustard naked, watching south park, but its totally cool cuz the paper plate is covering my nuts
Skanksgiving break is awesome already... pilgrim and indian roleplay tonight.
It was annoying to wait 4 hour for him to be inside for 5 seconds.
seeing an 80 year old woman puke in the bushes changes everything...
that's spring break in florida for ya
sorry for covering your dog in whipped cream. his bark made it sound like he wanted it.
its like accelerated beer pong for children.....we train champions young
apparently he thought telling me 'the weasel wants to come out to play' would somehow convince me to go down on him
just peed on the 7/11 floor and casually left. Omg so drunk
He asked me what I wanted the cake to say and I then asked him if "I'm sorry for throwing up in your bed last night" was too long. He said it was...
You told me that you were mad me because I wouldn't let you 'explore my castle'. Then you said I smelled like a hospital and passed out.
the best part was at the strip club when he said he was "here to pick up my wife. she's up on stage.....wait that's my aunt". only in Ottawa.
I hooked up with Spider-Man on the hood of Santas car. I kept saying that he could shoot his web at me. Also I found Waldo. Overall good night.
Just learned a valuable lesson today. Don't open snap chats from 3 am the next morning while sitting next to a small child. They totally saw your dick.
You were a for sure 10. You put on a traffic cone to meet someone.
I'd date him. I'd date the fucking shit out of him.
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