So i decided to deal with the awkwardness of last night by making out with all three of them
When the phrase "Wow your huge" came out of her mouth I knew it was gonna be a good night.
The cops found weed in michael jacksons house today...it makes up for the child molesting, I like him more now.
I have no idea what i drank..i remember dancing and ass grabbing..u falling. Headbutts. Trying not to puke. And deja vu.
For future reference, never invite the people you met at Dunkin Donuts at 2am to your house to watch Dogma
No fucking idea. Just paid for my chipotle in chocolate coins, though. Either there is a huge language barrier happening here, or my big boobs are finally paying off.
A man in denim coveralls just shotgunned a beer on the dance floor
Goats are brash and offensive and cocky animals
Are you high and at a petting zoo again?
Ok, Jen and I are going out tonight and getting rowdy. I think you and Steph need to come. I understand if you can't, but not going out means you're automatically obligated to post bail. If necessary.
You take your time. Wallowing in last nights filth is the best way to get over a hangover
so the photographer said "let's get a picture of the cousins" so we posed together, and then he said " lets get a picture of the couples" So we posed together.
Best oral ever, hands down so to speak. but I'm starting to want to meet that lesbian truck driver he says he's better than. Just for comparison purposes of course.
Breaking into his house to steal the sheets I'd drunk pissed on before he got home was not how I wanted to be spending spring break
My aunt comes over, haven't seen her in 4 years. First thing, looks me up and down and goes "...yup, that pair ripened nicely. Theyll get you some free drinks"
I think you were raised by the wrong sister
I have six new people in my phone that I don't remember adding. One of them is "Bourbon Yeah." Successful evening?
Randomize
