i can now get sex on a playground off my list of things to do in life.
im glad we only fight about serious things like the hills and disney scene it
we are cooking lunchables pizzas on a fire pit.
Is there a reason why the cops knew her name as they were chasing her?
that wasn't rum that I poured down your throat while you were sleeping
I got to explain to the guys at work today how i had no choice but to go to a gay bar because I was handcuffed to a lesbian.
Showed up physical therapy hammered. The therapist just says this isnt part of the program.
I asked him why the bed was wet and got.."well there are two options... and its not you."
You had me on my knees catching cheese balls in my mouth and moaning. In front of all your friends.
Naked. naked and bneed help.
She gave me a roadie as we drove home from fireworks. People were still lighting off their displays as we drove by. I love America.
WELP I KNOW THE HAPPY HOUR DRINKS WERE GOOD BECAUSE MOM JUST INFORMED ME I AM THE RESULT OF POKED HOLE IN THE DIAPHRAGM
Oh god I just had an orgasim riding my bike. I need to get laid pronto.
i am not an asshole. i paid for her to take a cab home.
dude, we were in ann arbor. she's from cincinnati. ten bucks didn't even get her back on I-94. i maintain my position. you are indeed an asshole.
You’ve seen my tits of course he broke his wedding vows
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