When he was fingering me, it felt/looked like he was digging around for pocket change.
I'm pretty sure there's seven mailboxes in the bathtub...
I just found glitter on my vibrator... whatever we're doing has to stop
I'm going to fuck him so hard that his dick is going to fracture
Glad to see your being a lady about this
as we were driving back from the frat house he pulled down his pants and convinced me his penis "wanted some air"
Do they take checks?
Did you really just ask me if you could write a check for a DRUG DEAL?
I don't have the urge to be a home-wrecker with these two. I think I've grown, don't you?
It's not meant to be. I also just shot a turkey baster of gin into Nate's eye, so....
Just remember my house smells of thick cut bacon and I have a big dick.
WHEN DID YOU SAY YOU COME BACK BC I GOT INVITED TO A KEG WAR PARTY
Hold on, I need to find something to wear that says "I don't contribute to your daughter's drug problem"
I'm scrolling through our convo thread and all we talk about is pizza, alcohol & dick with the occasional "I miss you" thrown in.
I think I was just motorboated by a 4-year old girl.
Our Uber driver pulled over to show us Tinder some dick pics. Top that.
I promised to leave my panties on but I didn't promise to not have sex
Randomize
