She made fun of how I walked so I announced to her boyfriend that I have cum on her face before.
sometimes when i'm walking through campus i wonder how many of these people have seen me puke
after last night, i judge her for not breaking up with me
At best buy, little boy just crawled into my stall while i was taking a shit
I walked outside out to find her peeing in her toga with a cigar in one hand and her thong in the other
well when do great stories at the expense of people's relationships become a bad thing?
It's been a wonderful constant drunkeness. We played Marco polo with some random like 8 yr olds in the kiddie pool.
I have pictures of you scratching against the sliding glass door on your knees screaming how you felt like a lamb.
reason #326 why I'm still single.... my date just told me there's a little boy ghost that lives in his closet because he likes his music.
just got permission to expense a nerf gun
You were drunk at 5 You went to the dining hall and cried because your brain and fingers weren't working. Your RA came up to you and suddenly you became sober. I was very proud of you.
Yo whoever left a thong on the dining room table, first of all get help second of all please remove it now
Married dude I had an affair with 10yrs ago was at table next to us at dinner last nite. My mom asked him to take a pic of us & then commented how cute he was as they left. Do I tell her he’s got a huge D too?
I'll seduce him with my charm, after all, I am a graceful swan.
More like a demented cow.
Have I told you i love you?
there's no need we are two peas in a naughty pod of fuckery
Randomize
