Is it bad that now when i read ingredients in the food I eat i only read it as shrooms instead of mushrooms ?
i flashed his best friends last night
you always were good at making good first impressions
That reminds me of that one time you handcuffed me to a table leg while I was reaching for the vodka.
just to let you know its hard to talk to your father while being fingered up against a car..
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Hes trying to fuck me on a bear rug. Not saying no.
There's green glitter on my nipple rings. #mardigras2013
If you take a post shower shit just get back in bed. You're better off starting your whole morning all over again.
I would bite a mans dick off for a chocolate milk.
Bourbon is too strong for my cat, he does not want to drink it
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Stay strong! Remember we're too uncoordinated to be strippers to make money instead of being a nurse
You know it's a good night when the word slut is imprinted on your ass and your hands smell like lube.
there is partying, then there is whatever we did last night.
Best news I’ve heard all day. Cookies and dick. What more could a girl ask for?
may or may not have snorted a line of tums... wtf.
From now on I'd like to be known as Rampage.
Randomize