i woke up with socks on this morning
so?
i didnt wear socks last night
Nicole vs. Life
i have only one word for you: 3somewithnorwegiangirls
Everything was good until you pulled the bartenders hair because she cut you off
I'm really tired of your booty call eating my fruity pebbles.
just cheers'ed a flock of cattle as i drove past eating a burger i bought 7 hours ago. that high.
i know it happened because it happened right beside me, and at one point on top of me.
So far, my day has been sparkling with the tears of a thousand rainbow unicorns. I'd say this is quality shit you've grown.
I got really high and googled the history of Amish people for like an hour.
This feeling I'm having... is it love or a combination of alcoholism and unprotected rough sex
WELL THEN WHAT DAY IS IT?!?! This whole having to choose between ruining my future and ruining my liver is totally killing my vibe
He lit a shoe on fire and tried putting it out by peeing on it
Remember the time you cried about coconuts
Yeah, sorry about that. Dropped the phone on my face while I was watching porn.
sooo, that video of you eating lasangna with the strobe going magically reappeared on my phone
Randomize
