My milkshake brings 85 to 90 percent of the boys to the yard
i asked him to tell me something nice and he said "your vagina is really tight."
the lady in the checkout infront of me had a case of beer, two 40 oz, and activia...really??i dont' think irregularity is her problem
Just made my alarm the Lion King song. Too excited about waking up to sleep.
I woke up from my nap, looked out my window, and saw about bout 6 people get tasered in less than 20 seconds.....could someone please tell me what's going on.
The guy in front of me got in the club with his green card, that's awesome
He has in a pan: ten pieces of bacon, two cloves of garlic, an egg (not scrambled or hard boiled, just an egg) and frozen corn.
I almost lit my balls on fire tonight.
As a 47 yo who just boned a 22 yo, it was definitely a walk of pride. She is a major feather in my aging cap.
I just swallowed some ecstasy stuck in my nose from last night. Work should be interesting.
Just smoked a joint with the hottest patient. God I love night shifts.
Settled one third of the tab. Am going back for sex. Love you, make friends
He's over here like "remember those pics you sent me a couple years ago? Those were hot." And I'm like "remember talking about what we were gonna name our kids a couple months ago? That was hot." Therein lies the disconnect
There it is. Caramel-coated dick. Someone is getting a yeast infection later.
You ate all the burritos in sight....I cant take you to mexican restaurants anymore
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