Raise your hand if you bought 2 annoying girls shots of water. CLOWNS.
Didn't tell him I was on my period. Then had to surreptitiously remove some uterine lining from his cock.
I peed while puking? Even better
Yes you most deff did. Ultimate multi tasker you are
Random question, how's your gag reflex these days
There's a walmart bag of my vomit outside my front door. I just really need someone to appreciate that with me.
is the shake weight an appropriate valentine's day present?
Did we fight the bathroom girl ? She just wanted to give us lotion and condoms.
As I climbed in the bathroom window from the room I noticed both him rommates staring and talking about me in the hall...
Can we just discuss how hundreds of miles away we were both beyond drunk and in some boys bed. That is the definition of friendship.
OMG I WAS JUST THINKING ABOUT HOW OUR FRIENDSHIP IS SO REAL BECAUSE I SHOW YOU DICK PICS AND WE LAUGH TOGETHER.
I'm at the level of despair that only Panda Express can fix
It's acceptable to bring him back to my parents house and fuck on the couch right??
Instead of saying hi she asked if she could touch your dick through your ski bib and NOW I understand why you wore it to the bars
Day drunk. He was sitting in the back seat, opened the door, leaned out, and peed right there in the dutch bros drive through. No one even noticed haha
Just bought 2 liters of wine and frozen waffles for dinner. Is this 30?
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