i'm chasing tequila w mint flavored ice cream, phil's chasing it w cream cheese, bashar's chasing it w pickles...i think we all know who the winner is....
We'll cross that bridge when we come to it... Or burn it. Either way we'll deal with it later
So what if i ate it off the ground. Its like i found a five dollar bill just laying there, in burrito form.
I love memorial day. It's drinking in the name of patriotism. God Bless America
I just want dick. Yours just gets priority because it is glorious
Is it ironic that the girl with the horse face is also on the equestrian team?
I was afraid that she would smell her boyfriend's penis on my breath while we were talking.
i've eaten like 19 popsicles... what the fuck have you done today?
We need to be on the same page regarding the 3some this time. No more "one of us should probably leave" moments.
strip vodka pong is never a good idea. I saw into his colon when he picked up the ball off the floor
Ah well. Drinking wouldn't be drinking without mystery bruises
Agreed.
Dude you spoke to a girl about CRICKET. She MUST want sex
yeah it's a weird friendship. we pretend that we're automatic besties but i know we both know i slept with her boyfriend
my Mom is now my Eskimo sister... she fucked my ex in my bed and took a selfie
We got stoned and watched Disney movies all night. I think I'm in love.
Randomize
