We were playing flip cup on the nice dining room table. Losing team had to shamwow the table in between rounds
I submitted an essay to my history teacher comparing changes in the middle ages to the song changes by David Bowie. I can't wait to see my grade on that.
im guessing your the one that tried to make bacon in the toaster
I saw him coke blaxckout on the subway at 9 this morning yelling at people callig himself the gatekeeper.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
There are 3 guys sitting in the elevator in lawn chairs wearing sunglasses and holding beers. the hallway rugs are stuffed in a trash can. i've never been so glad to be sober.
Why am I the only one concerned that there's a dog in the movie theatre?
Who wrote Most Moistest Dad on my chest and what the fuck does it mean?!?
If is anything like my past relationships, I have no doubt that I will single-handedly reignite the Cold War
Which one of you fuckers thought itd be funny to see if the kitchen table can float.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You know I'm dangerous when I have make-out withdrawals
So some drunk guy just tried to convince me with all of his passion that bacon is a color
We watched the first ever season of SNL and fucked for so long. He accidentally punched me in the face, but I mean, John Belushi was the background noise of our sex. I can deal with it.
Operation: 12 Dick pics of Christmas was a sweeping success, thanks for asking!
I told him I was ready for another round and he said, "after this part." What guy chooses James Bond over pussy?!
We fucked to Bonnie Tyler in my car. He's the one.
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