Omg! Love it! Cant find L*****
What!!?? Like after last night you lost her?
Yea me and L***** came back to out hotel at 3am to regroup then went back out; police and 2 bars later, I don't know what happened. Vegas is nuts!
Well douche your snatch and let's go!
he has a girlfriend so we used my stuffed animals to pretend to have sex
Call me "white mamba"
Your dick is not a dangerous deadly poisonous snake
It is white.
i kinda want to bang the mythbusters girl... i bet she's got a nice snapper
yeah it's now facebook official. i can no longer pretend shes my girl on the side
I'll listen to your side of the story when you stop being such a whore.
Whenever I said your name you screamed polo and did another shot.
fuck that im pissed. when I come back im ripping forskin off.
wait a second. did i just remember you the other night referring to your tits as tia and tamara.....
Hes stumbling drunkenly around the streets of New York with a balloon vagina on his head. I'd say hes having a good night.
I'm two guys short from fucking the whole baseball team and one is gay. I will be successful by the end of this month.
I take pride in being a married 31 year old who sleeps on her best friend's bathroom floor from time to time.
I remember puking but I don't remember where. PSA: don't go barefoot around the house
So... my daughter's new girlfriend Is the daughter of the girl I dated on and off in college Who ran away because she got pregnant at my house party. My Legitimate daughter Is probably fucking my Illegitimate daughter...
Randomize
