well we can cross tagging a chick in a movie theatre off the list of things to do before we die
Whenever I miss you I just turn on Tool Academy
After he came he asked what I was doing for thanksgiving.
I remember pointing out how smooth my legs were to try to direct his attention away from my vagina.
Stripper with the black hair and lip rings is still asleep. Found out she wasn't lying when she said she was a squirter, it was like splash mountain.
My month off booze swimsuit season diet plan is working well. Plus I'm learning so much about my house, did you know a girl named Meagan lives here?
Woke up naked next to Alex and he was braiding my hair and then commented on how healthy my hair was. I don't even know anymore..
I cannot even describe to you the most amazing ass I have ever had the pleasure of seeing walk up the stairs in front of me just now.
Now in just stoned listening to my dads philosophical idea about public transit
I got a 5/5 with my "I don't want a baby" rant essay. She said my use of the word "leeches" was a powerful metaphor :)
If muffins & morning blowjobs don't make him happy, frankly, I don't think anything will.
Man, that hitchhiker cursed me.
I don't know what that means. Any of it. BUT I will be at your house at 10:20 and you better be ready to get high as balls.
How ironic... opening your legs for closure.
FYI - Don’t go in the downstairs bathroom. Ryan is passed out naked on the floor with a raging hard on.
Randomize
