People in love make me want to vomit
Do you ever make guys send you dick pictures just cause it's hilarious?
Just woke up on a couch in the FIJI house with 2 missed calls from someone I saved in my phone as "Some DU Kid Named TJ Maybe"
you make me proud to be your friend
My cardio has turned into running out of the cold from bar to bar.
I think they were cool with it, they should have know if I was the host of the baby shower it was going to involve a keg and jager shots.
We shouldn't eat pizza in the pool
We r drinking tequila out a glass bottle and smoking weed underwater, pizzas the least of our concern
Something about Sunday night screams phone sex
Fuck romance. Just shaved my nipples in the shower because I felt like it. That's the life I'm about.
Not sure if creeper guy is too drunk to talk or I'm too high to listen.
I WANT PIZZA BUT I ALSO WANT SELF ESTEEM
BUT LIKE WHO AM I TO EVER CARE ABOUT SELF ESTEEM
Nothing but goodness could come from two friends getting naked. Think of all the good advice and other things we could give to each other.
Like the fear of satan was put into my heart when I saw him put that sandwich on the WOODEN BENCH
Honestly at least you're not debating on whether or not you need to take plan b. But I can't because I spent all my money on pizza.
I wish I was there so i could bitch slap his incredibly sexy face
Only good thing about the 50 Shades is that it is now completely OK to call a credit card co to dispute the charge for nipple clamps that didnt arrive.
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